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The Difference Between a Big Ego and a Weak or Strong Ego
The term “ego” has a bad rep, but in fact, having a strong ego indicates mental health in contrast to a weak or big ego. In Freud’s structural model of the psyche, “I” was translated to the Latin, “ego.” Unlike the primitive “id” seen in infants, the ego develops in stages and represents the “reality principle.” It delays gratification and mediates the id’s wants, emotions, and instinctual drives with reality. Its functions are control, judgment, tolerance, reality testing, planning, defense, memory, synthesis of information, and intellectual functioning.
The conscience or super-ego, evident around 5 years old, is idealistic and perfectionistic. It absorbs rules and standards from our parents, other authority figures, religion, and culture. When it becomes demanding, critical, or punishing it’s often referred to as your “inner critic.”
A Strong Ego
People with a strong ego see themselves and reality objectively and respond to others and life realistically. A strong ego socializes us, facilitates the exercise of our will, and anticipates, remembers, and plans for the future. Knowing and respecting oneself, such a person respects others and can establish protective boundaries. In sum, it modulates the demands of the world, our passions, and the restrictions of our super-ego. To reduce this tension and accompanying anxiety, it employs defense mechanisms, such as denial, repression, sublimation, rationalization, splitting, projection, and more.
People with strong egos have confidence, emotional intelligence, and common sense. They both experience and manage their emotions and can find solutions to life’s problems. Rather than react, they have a defined sense of self and are resilient to life’s challenges. Using their intellect they can foresee consequences, and with self-discipline, they can pursue and accomplish goals.
A Weak Ego
An undeveloped or weak ego may be due to dysfunctional parenting that is oppressive, abusive, invasive, or neglectful. Someone with a weak ego is easily overwhelmed by the demands of the id, other people, and life’s problems. They have difficulty controlling their id impulses. When confronted with difficulties, they may give up and escape through fantasy or…
