Open in app

Sign in

Write

Sign in

Darlene Lancer
Darlene Lancer

3.4K Followers

Home

About

Published in

Narcissism and Abusive Relationships

·Pinned

Disabling Abusers’ Favorite Weapon: Projection

Projection is a defense mechanism commonly used by abusers, including people with narcissistic or borderline personality disorder and addicts. Basically, they say, “It’s not me, it’s you!” When we project, we are defending ourselves against unconscious impulses or traits, either positive or negative, that we’ve denied in ourselves. Instead we…

Narcissism

5 min read

Disabling Abusers’ Favorite Weapon: Projection
Disabling Abusers’ Favorite Weapon: Projection
Narcissism

5 min read


Published in

Narcissism and Abusive Relationships

·5 days ago

Understanding the Danger and 5 M’s of Gaslighting and What to Do

Identifying gaslighting behavior and knowing steps to combat it are essential to maintaining your self-esteem, and mental and emotional health. Gaslighting is a form of narcissistic abuse that’s used not only by narcissists, but also by sociopaths, addicts, and other abusers. Sometimes, it’s intentional, and sometimes it has become a…

Narcissistic Abuse

3 min read

Understanding Gaslighting and the Steps to Deal with It
Understanding Gaslighting and the Steps to Deal with It
Narcissistic Abuse

3 min read


Published in

Poems, Revelation, and Musings

·Dec 1

Letting Go Isn’t Easy

Mostly, letting go refers to a person or thing we had or loved. But how do we let go of yearning for what we never had and unlived dreams?

Poetry

1 min read

Letting Go Isn’t Easy
Letting Go Isn’t Easy
Poetry

1 min read


Published in

Becoming You

·Nov 30

What is Self-Love Beyond Self-Esteem and Acceptance

How are self-love and self-esteem different? We look for love, yet underestimate the importance of self-love. But we can only receive as much love as we give to ourselves. We’ll deflect or guard love that doesn’t resonate with us — like a compliment we don’t believe. The opposite is also…

Self

6 min read

What is Self-Love Beyond Self-Esteem and Acceptance
What is Self-Love Beyond Self-Esteem and Acceptance
Self

6 min read


Published in

Poems, Revelation, and Musings

·Nov 18

My Amazon Adventure Behind the Green Curtain

I climbed down from the single-engine plane and stepped onto the rich Amazon soil on the outskirts of Puerto Maldonado in southeast Peru, an hour’s flight from Cusco. My rainforest adventure would far surpass the Incan ruins I’d just visited at Machu Picchu. In the one-room airport, a representative from…

Amazon

7 min read

My Amazon Adventure Behind the Green Curtain
My Amazon Adventure Behind the Green Curtain
Amazon

7 min read


Published in

Relationships 101

·Nov 17

The Difference Between Kindness and Codependency

Do you wonder whether you’re a kind, empathetic person or codependent? There is a difference between empathy and codependency. Some codependents are not so caring, and some people who are are not codependent. So what’s the difference? First, the definition of codependency has nothing to do with kindness, although many…

Codependency

4 min read

The Difference Between Kindness and Codependency
The Difference Between Kindness and Codependency
Codependency

4 min read


Published in

Narcissism and Abusive Relationships

·Nov 12

How Narcissistic Parents Can’t Relate and Damage Their Children

Narcissistic parents can be emotionally abusive due to the symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder. This is because they lack empathy and the ability to see their children as separate from themselves. They see things in black and white, must be right, and cannot tolerate taking responsibility for mistakes due to…

Parenting

3 min read

How Narcissistic Parents Can’t Relate and Damage Their Children
How Narcissistic Parents Can’t Relate and Damage Their Children
Parenting

3 min read


Published in

Poems, Revelation, and Musings

·Nov 5

The Stages of Narcissistic Relationships

Narcissistic relationships often go through a painful cycle that is a predictable outgrowth of narcissistic personality disorder. Central to understanding a narcissist’s behavior is that their relationships are transactional. Their impaired boundaries and lack of empathy prevent them from seeing other people as separate three-dimensional beings with needs and feelings…

Narcissism

7 min read

The Stages of Narcissistic Relationships
The Stages of Narcissistic Relationships
Narcissism

7 min read


Published in

Becoming You

·Oct 31

Heal Yourself with Unconditional Love

“Unconditional Presence: Letting Yourself Have Your Experience” Since we can never gain assurance that we are lovable through trying to prove our worth or cover up our flaws, what we need instead is a way to discover our core nature as intrinsically beautiful, already, just as it is. …

Presence

7 min read

Heal Yourself with Unconditional Love
Heal Yourself with Unconditional Love
Presence

7 min read


Published in

Relationships 101

·Oct 28

Dodge a Bullet: Know the Relationship Red Flags

People confuse excitement and anxiety. They think how anxious they are to meet someone to be a sign of chemistry and love. It might be the wrong kind of chemistry — meaning that this person reminds you of problems in your family of origin, possibly an abusive parent or sibling…

Relationships

3 min read

Dodge a Bullet: Know the Relationship Red Flags
Dodge a Bullet: Know the Relationship Red Flags
Relationships

3 min read

Darlene Lancer

Darlene Lancer

3.4K Followers

Therapist-Author of “Codependency for Dummies,” relationship expert. Get a FREE 14 Tips on Letting Go http://bit.ly/MN2jSG. Join me on FB http://on.fb.me/WnMQMH

Following
  • Trexxa's Erotica Emporium

    Trexxa's Erotica Emporium

  • Jason V Brock

    Jason V Brock

  • Nils von Kalm

    Nils von Kalm

  • Ryan Fan

    Ryan Fan

  • Myla Morningstar

    Myla Morningstar

See all (744)

Help

Status

About

Careers

Blog

Privacy

Terms

Text to speech

Teams